Saturday, September 27, 2008
I will never marry you! But am I wrong for not telling you that??
Have you ever enjoyed someone's company, had wonderful sex, loved to kick it with them..... But you knew that you would never settle down with them? For whatever reason, you enjoy the person you are with but you know that isn't "wifey"? Or for that matter, you love being his boo and wearing his jersey around the crib but he is not "husband material". The question of the day is "Should you be honest about your intentions or lack thereof and risk hurt feelings and potentially getting dumped"? Or should you just enjoy the ride and avoid the subject of the future and marriage whenever it comes up?? Are we responsible for what our spouses expect? If you know that person is not the one, is it fair for you to continue the relationship knowing they expect more? Chime in Guys, let us know what you think.......... And keep it real !!!
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3 comments:
Absolutely, you should be honest about your intentions regardless if the other person get their feelings hurt. I was in a situation where I caught feelings for someone and they expressed the need to be friends only, and I respected that but however they were not totally honest because every attempt I tried to be their friend, calling them, checking on them I got no communication or a response to my calls. I had to go to emotional rehab (I to kick that shit cold turkey) but I am good. Wished they would have been honest and stated that they did not want to be friends. Shit happens. You will get over it but if you never open up your heart/feelings you will miss out on that unique love that we all are searching for in some shape form or fashion. You should treat people the way you want to be treated. If you know the person is not the one you should tell them, if you are blessed with seeing today you should make the most of it and not settle. Last but not least you should always BE TRUE TO THY SELF.
Just my opinion, but our only responsibility to another human being is to be honest about where you are in your process. I will be honest with you but it's up to you to decide where to go from there. This dude I use to kick it had a lot of feelings for me and I had a LOT of sexual feelings for him. But that was it... he wanted a lot more than I did at the time. Hell, I was still married ( this is when me and my husband were separated). I had to let him know that it was not going to happen between him and I on that level and he exercised his right to move on. At the end of the day though, I was pleased with the way it went down. We were able to still be friends and no respect was lost. Hell, I wish some dudes in my past would have gave me the same courtesy instead of leading me on.
Yes you should tell the othe person, why waste your time or theirs. if someone has the intention on getting married....you need to let them know so they can move on..
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